Refrigerator Art

I received today from my daughter the very first of what I am sure will be many years of refrigerator art. I am actually most impressed by the fact that she chose to color more than two seconds on the same piece of paper. Typically when I color with her, she considers a page to be "finished" after a couple of scribbles.

I used to think my mom was crazy for stockpiling years and years of "junk" from my childhood days forward. But now I'm starting to feel a little sentimental myself...

My Camera Came Home!

I dropped my camera about a month ago. :(

Shortly after that, I realized that I did actually do some damage to the lens, and it required servicing. So, I sent my camera off to be fixed, and have really really really missed it!! (By the way, a little "shout out" to my dad for being the hero of the day and speeding up the process)

Today it came home via UPS. Picture updates coming soon!

Twilight Review

So, I admitted in my post last night that, yes...I have subscribed to the recent fad in novels, The Twilight Series, by Stephenie Meyer. It's taken a while for me to organize my thoughts about them, but I think I'm finally ready to put it out there. Here I go...

I believe that we can look for the glory of God anywhere. He is able to shine His Light into any place at any time. As my husband has recently quoted from a book he is reading for Seminary, "God is the only One who is able to use sin sinlessly."

So even (and especially!) when I read a book like Twilight, I read with discernment. I enjoy the fiction, but I try not to miss any of the hidden messages that point to the glory of Christ or that might lead to the glory of man. As I read through this book, and even afterwards as I dialogued with other Christian friends - single friends, married friends, moms of teenagers - I realized that this could be a very dangerous piece of work.

It's not that I didn't enjoy it; rather, the problem is that I did. The greatest issue is not with the fact that the author is a professing Mormon, or that the book was filled with negative assumptions in regards to marriage; though these things are clearly opposing to my worldview. The problem is that the storyline - a tale of perfect mystical love - is so deeply captivating that it is easy, over the course of the four books, to "train" your heart to desire the kind of emotional satisfaction developed within the pages. When you leave the world of Edward and Bella, you might feel a kind of emptiness and longing that, if you believed was justified, you would begin searching for in your own life. And though God is ready and waiting, the book definitely doesn't lead you to search for Him as the answer to this longing.

I read this passage today, which summed up perfectly the danger that my heart was feeling in regards to this book. Again, I read Twilight, I think the author is truly gifted in her ability to capture her audience - and I might recommend it for someone who clearly understands the truth of the Word of God that only Jesus can satisfy - but it is definitely a thin rope to be walking on for anyone, myself included. Without going back often to the scriptures, without a husband that is leading me day by day to the foot of the cross, without a Jesus that fights every day for my love, I would still face these temptations myself!

Romans 1:22-26 (ESV)

"Claiming to be wise, they became fools, and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal man and birds and animals and creeping things. Therefore God gave them up in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, to the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves, because they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever! Amen. For this reason God gave them up to dishonorable passions."

Edward Cullen, Michael O'Brien, and My Husband

On the (great) advice of a trusted friend, I delved into the Twilight novels a few weeks ago. I am not a fan of fantasy/Sci-Fi, and consider most memories of high school to be nightmarish at best, so it was quite a leap for me just to read the first sentence. But I have to admit, I enjoyed the storyline and came away with many great thoughts for discussion, and I have prompted quite a few others (including my husband) to begin reading them.

Last night, as I was reading through Stephenie Meyer's (Twilight author) website, I came across some pretty heavy critics of her work. There are those, apparently, who have found that the book has inspired in them a new standard for romance, love, and how a man should treat a woman; even to the point where wives have filed for divorce and women have left long-standing relationships in search of what they truly "deserve." And as I was reading it, my heart began to break.

Tonight, my husband and I (on our weekly date night!) enjoyed a concert by the talented pianist/singer Michael O'Brien. Afterward, my husband and I were sipping coffee, and he mentioned something about wondering if I ever wished he were more like Michael O'Brien, able to play and sing beautiful songs about love. I laughed out loud and told him that I wanted just him - just the way he was, especially when he does a good job loving me, and even when he does a bad job. And it got me thinking once again about the Twilight books and the worldly standard for love.

And you know what? I am so thankful for a husband who "gets it." Hear me out, ladies - I love my man...but he is not always perfect. However, no matter what, I know that he strives to love me like Christ loved the church, not like Edward loved Bella, not like the love songs Michael O'Brien sings to his wife, not like my dad loves my mom, not like his buddies love their wives. My man is focused on the one example that will never ever lead him astray. Because of that, I am secure. I can know that even when he doesn't quite make it to second base, I realize he was aiming for the spotlights all along. When he attempts to be Bob-the-Builder and instead has to run out last minute for a bottle of Draino, it was all done with an amazing heart of service. When he leaves me a sappy sweet note on the bathroom mirror with all sorts of typos and missing words, it was written with a heart of 100% gold. When it's all done with the goal of being like Christ, how could I ever want anything more?!?

Ephesians 5:25-28 (The Message)

Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church—a love marked by giving, not getting. Christ's love makes the church whole. His words evoke her beauty. Everything he does and says is designed to bring the best out of her, dressing her in dazzling white silk, radiant with holiness. And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They're really doing themselves a favor—since they're already "one" in marriage.

The Purple Dinosaur

E is really into (gasp!) Barney right now. The extra-large talking purple dinosaur is not my first pick for a TV show, but it certainly rates higher than some of the other ADHD-inducing children's shows that are out there these days.

E certainly seems to like him. And I will admit, I've learned to appreciate the fact that she is learning songs, colors, feelings, numbers, animals and many other appropriately-educational concepts that we get to carry over into our playtime together.

Take for instance, the 45 min-long car ride today that was filled from start to finish with rounds of, "Row, Row, Row Your Boat," "You are Special," "Do Your Ears Hang Low," and other silly songs that bring out the biggest grin imaginable on that sweet little face. Even when it's Barney-inspired, there's no doubt that God gave her the sweetest little smile and one of the best laughs ever.

And, oh...the fun memories we will get to share with her and her teenage boyfriend one day about the times when she couldn't get enough of the "I Love You" song. You see, folks, even Barney comes back full circle. :)

I'd Like a Dirty Diaper with a Side of Humility, Please

I bumped into a college friend and his wife tonight who are expecting their first, and are getting ready to find out the sex of the baby within the next month. They were so cute - so bubbly and excited about being pregnant, wondering about girl or boy, looking forward to the stages of babyhood, etc.

All I could say to them is, "You're going to love it. Being a mom is one of the best things in the whole world." Which is definitely 100% true. What is nearly impossible to communicate, though, is just how humbling and life-changing being a parent is. That God's plan for parents is just as much about making us holy as it is about raising the children He gave us in the way He desires.

Today I did one of those things that I swore to myself I'd never do as a parent. E asked for something, I said no and began to offer an alternative, she started to whine, and - because we were in a restaurant with other people - I quickly gave in to her request...before I even realized what I was doing. It was SO EASY to just give in so that we didn't cause a scene. I caught - out of the corner of my eye - someone who'd witnessed the scene as they turned to the person to the side, noting the double-standards they'd just seen me portray to my child. And I wanted to crawl under the table and die.

We all have our moments, I guess. Our moments of weakness, our moments of inconsistency, our moments of airheadedness, our moments where we want to crawl under the table and die. Fortunately, though - God doesn't depend on our perfection in order to carry out His perfect plan for our children. In fact, if we allow Him, He uses our flaws to point to Jesus Christ, the Author and Finisher of our children's faith. Our humility in times of mistakes can allow for the grace of the cross to sweep in and flood our children's hearts, even if our mistakes cause them pain. How 'bout that!?!?!

God in a Box

We're finite beings, so it is absolutely totally against our human nature to conceive of an infinite God. We simply cannot fully grasp that quality of his nature. If, at any given moment we are able to define and control "infinite," then either "infinite" would cease to exist and become irreversably "finite" or we would become God because of our all-knowingness. It's a concept that's been swimming around in my brain for a while: infinite-ness is one of those characteristics of God that shadows the full image of God.

So though it should be ridiculous to even consider placing an infinite God in a humanly-conceived box, we still do it - dare I say we must do it. We can't help it - and God knows and accepts us even in that. Some people's boxes may be a little smaller than others, or have different exceptions than others, but everybody perceives God, at least at some point in their lives, with limitations. Whether they do this on purpose or because of ignorance may be the only distinction.

I realized today that I was limiting God in my own ways. I'm a Martha-hearted girl in many areas; doing comes much more naturally than being. When I see or define a goal in my personal or professional life, I am much more inclined to lay out the steps needed to achieve that goal and then start checking them off the list than I am to simply lay it at the foot of the cross and trust God to move on my behalf in a way that would bring Him the most glory.

Today, God - like the ultimate chess player that He is - decided to move His "castle" instead of the "pawn" that I was expecting/anticipating. I had to take a step back in absolute awe of how incredibly inconceivable his workings are, and how much he truly cares for me and is moving on my behalf right now, not to mention how much more control He has than I had imagined in my little "box" that I had built around him. Now that box is stretched a little bit more in that area, and the God that I know and love today is a little bigger today in my finite head than He was yesterday. He is always and forever the infinite God who sits on the Throne in Heaven; just because my vantage point is limited by my humanity doesn't change that. But praise Him that He cares enough for me to allow me each day a bigger glimpse of that glory, even with my limitations!!